I'm done with being unkind to myself! Share the love...

I am declaring war on unkindness…

What will it take to stop those negative thoughts of not doing enough, not being enough, not achieving enough?

What are we all trying to achieve anyway? Where are we all rushing off to anyway?

As I am recovering from an illness at home at the moment, I don’t have much choice to rest as I’m still a bit weak after being incapacitated. It’s #WorldKindnessDay today too, and as I was playing with some graphics I decided to write myself a little note to remind me to be kinder to myself today. I really don’t need to rush back into my business, rush to try and join in on social media, rush to get all the jobs completed in my home, rush rush rush. The voice in my head telling me I have to get strong, I have to be back achieving again asap otherwise ‘this’ ‘that’ ‘the other’…

My little note to self!

This is the note I added to my desktop.

I then thought I wonder who else is feeling like they need this message today?

So I just started sending it on messenger to a few people, then I thought I’ll just keep sending it to a few more, and a few more. Before I knew it I was feeling the compulsion to send it to everyone. I was a little worried that people might think I was spamming them! A little reminder, we all need it don’t we? We can all be so unkind to ourselves through our thoughts and actions without really realising it.

I had an amazing response from many, I was astounded really! Here are just a few and they are still coming back to me. If you want to feel better, first do something for others!

The real secret to healing through fear and change

Four weeks ago I began to feel unrest in my breath. It started in my solar plexus and this began to affect my practice and my walks out in nature. I am very connected to my breath being a strong advocate and teacher of mindfulness, and I had noticed that something felt off.

After then experiencing a bad cold, I was feeling a shift coming. Not just physical but a much deeper shift inside myself and my world. Over the weeks my breathing got worse, after attending a silent meditation day retreat, I was back at the doctors being given an inhaler and antibiotics for a chest infection. I hate being unwell and for a few days I resisted the complete rest that I needed in the present moment, tried to carry on and then the most scary thing happened at the end of that week.

I couldn’t catch my breath, even with the inhaler. I could not control my breathing and by the middle of the night I was shaking all over, for the first time in my life I was really terrified and in deep fear, I called 111 I needed to truly surrender and ask for healing support. I realised deeply in these moments that my breath is my life force and my source of connection, that I had taken my breath so much for granted, that I had not let go into the present moment and I began to lose a level of trust in myself when I intuitively felt something was out of alignment for weeks.

A deeper connection creates light, diminishes fear.

But why had I not asked for help at the first signs of feeling off? Well of course, it is the reason that so many of us do not ask for support. The compulsion to keep going out of FEAR. Fear that we are not enough, that others many not see us for who we really are, that we don’t want to appear to be weak in some way. That as a woman in the business world we are ‘always on the upward trajectory’ and not showing what is really going on inside.

I’ve been shifting strongly in my life and work path for around three years now and each time a change comes, fear invites me to go deeper. Each time it happens I further allow it show me what needs to be shown and peel off another layer to my true self.

I decided to share what was happening online in my Radiant Leaders group. As soon as I did a chain reaction began, others who were feeling the shift came forward to support me back to love and alignment with myself. Even when we can’t see our own way our of the dark, our connection with ourselves and others never gives up on us. Love never ends, it always finds a way to connect back though us, even if that is through our fear. I have learned this last week to truly surrender to my breath, to my connection to my life force, to receive with grace that I needed connection and support with this process. No surprises that this strong shift happened in the lead up to 11/11, a time of strong connection and burning healing in the world. As I watch the news of catastrophic events in California this feels even more poignant this week.

To enjoy the rainbow, first enjoy the rain. Paulo Coelho

As a highly sensitive and through my quiet practice I feel energy strongly, not only in myself and others but in world events and I believe that we are all being called to connect with ourselves on a deeper healing level to allow more love and light into ourselves and our own world.

Over the last week I have been called to look for rainbows a message of a union between the sky and the earth, the rainbow serves as a bridge between the two.

As a result of this awareness, some of my connections came forward and offered support as we shared with each other about what was currently happening for us. Connection! Connection brought me back. I began to breathe through the discomfort and pain and as a result my own connection began to come back to myself and through others…

One of those beautiful souls is Liz Carreira who connected with me via my closed Facebook Group Radiant Leaders. Liz offered me a distance reiki healing…

“Karen and I had been talking about which essential oils could best support her with her symptoms. After going through it we met for coffee where Karen took away a sample of an oil blend with how she could apply them”.

”When Karen posted that her symptoms were quite bad, I felt guided to get in touch and offered Karen a distance reiki session, and results were incredible. On the follow up after session I mentioned which oils i used and these same oils were perfect match for how Karen was feeling. I absolutely love what I do and enjoy helping people by giving them the space to allow healing to take place. And combining it with therapeutic grade oils just amplifies it even more.”

Another one of my Radiant Leaders Anna Alcock also supported me. Anna said “As an Empath and woman of Intuition, I felt called to support Karen through a time she needed to be held. To nurture her energy and emotions through a period of massive transformation. When your body is processing change, the fears, emotions and physical symptoms can sabotage the opportunity to evolve. I wanted to support Karen to grow through these changes, recognising a significant point in her journey back to her truth”.

I believe I was offered these guided healing supports because I energetically called for them through my own connection to myself and the present moment. My connection to who I really am is strong and even though I temporarily went into deep fear and isolation, my connection brought me back from fear to love for myself, my breath and those around me.

When you feel disconnected from life and fear kicks in, remember that it is always temporary, as everything is, this too shall pass. As a result, my breath-work and practice is now becoming stronger than ever. I feel a detrimental connection to my breathing and what it means to breathe and be fully present. When fear of change kicks in, remember who you are, breathe deeply and reach out for support, connection and healing. The love will always be there, ready for you to reconnect, waiting for you to let go, surrender and remember who you are, to know that ALL. IS. WELL.

“Always say “yes” to the present moment. What could be more futile, more insane, than to create inner resistance to what already is? what could be more insane than to oppose life itself, which is now and always now? Surrender to what is. Say “yes” to life — and see how life suddenly starts working for you rather than against you.” 
― Eckhart Tolle

If you’re currently feeling the deep fear of change in your life and work, connect with us in my free group Radiant Leaders for women who want to create their lives from truth and love. Creating high vibe connections are vital for your energy and growth. Join my amazing FREE tribe of supportive & authentic leaders who are born to shine their light in the world just like you. JOIN RADIANT LEADERS

About my connections…

Liz

Liz Carreira enjoys helping people by giving them the space to allow healing to take place combining Reiki with therapeutic grade oils which promotes healing and recovery.

You can find out more about Liz and her work in her Facebook Group here.

Anna

Anna Alcock is an intuitive guide, artist and energy Healer. She works with all the elements and your energy to align people back with their soul, to their truth & what brings them joy. To recognise the signs and synchronicities that show up as sign posts along their way giving them the courage to share their voice . You can find out more about Anna and her work here in her Facebook Group.

Are you tuning out or tuning in?

Are you spending time escaping your life? Becoming a little unconscious to the crazy busy world? Do any of these things resonate with you?

• Sleeping in more than you'd like at the weekends and your snooze button is worn out

• Getting down that bottle of wine without really realising it

• Polishing off a large packet of your favourite snack in record time in automatic pilot mode

• Not able to help getting involved in the latest office drama

• Collecting those busy badges of honor

• Scrolling and rolling on social media for hours until your eyes are so tired you have to go to bed

• Binge watching box sets until you feel ready to throw up

• Not being able to speak to anyone before your first of a million coffees

All of these things are deadening the voice inside you. They are tuning you out from your inner voice. That inner voice that would tell you if something is off or out of balance. Something may be out of kilter and needs your attention. Perhaps there is a truth that you don't want to hear? And it's not always the first thing that we feel.

The trouble with escaping it all is that often these things that disguise themselves as pleasurable, and it is easier not to listen in because, you are telling yourself you don't have time or it'll blow over eventually. However, one day those emotions and thoughts you are pushing to the side will start to spill over. And when we don't have the inner awareness to acknowledge our fears and emotions we can be so out of touch with them that this can spark a negative effect on our outer experiences, relationships and on how our business is going.

This can show up in our outer experiences in many ways:

• You finish working late and no-one has tidied the kitchen (again). You feel less than valued and end up shouting at the person you are supposed to love the most.

• You wake up late for an appointment and struggle to have patience with the other drivers on the road who seem to be intent on making you later than ever.

• You don't get an answer to the text you just sent, so you text someone else for attention and when they don't answer straight away you feel hurt and angry.

• Everyone at work is just plain annoying 99% of your day, it's more comfortable to hibernate at your desk than to potentially have a conflict in the office.

• You never have quality time with your loved ones there's just too much to do and not enough time to do it all in. This is making you feel depressed.

• You just want an hour to yourself but your diary is constantly packed out with things for everyone else but you.

• You never seem to get past that financial target and are consistently worried about your outgoings

It's just not sustainable to continue to live in this way. More importantly you're probably not feeling like you're really living if this is your experience of life. The reason is because your emotions are not being felt and expressed, you're avoiding what's really going on and you're scared to face that voice inside because it is going to tell you the truth, and so you go round in circles day after day, week after week. And there may be a deeper message that you are ignoring.

For example:

• You're feeling disconnected in your closest relationship - so you shout at the dog

• You're feeling down about your career or business but you're too fearful to change - so you keep procrastinating talking to your boss

• You feel lonely - so you keep berating yourself for not finding that person you crave a close connection with

• You had a hurtful experience in the past that you never want to go back to again - so you keep a distance from people who remind you

There is a way back to truth that will help you on your journey to getting back to feeling more alive, regain balance with your emotions and get back to feeling good again each and every day.

There is bad news and good news :)

The good news:

It is entirely your choice to feel more alive and even better than you ever thought possible and the way you can begin to do it is totally free.

The bad news:

You are going to get uncomfortable doing it.

What is the answer? SILENCE.

Yep. Silence.

Silence can change your life as it allows you to listen to the truth. It's the way the light gets back into your life. When you become quiet silence will speak to you. It will be your greatest teacher. It will support you to process the emotions, thoughts and beliefs you have been escaping from. Sound a bit strange?

Listen to silence. It has so much to say. Rumi

Giving yourself the gift of silence will open up a powerful space for you to listen to that voice within and let go of what is causing you to disconnect with yourself so often, and yes it could get a little uncomfortable along the way, but with support it's a small price to pay to feel the freedom of actually living.

Next time you feel like numbing out from your day to day life, instead of reaching for that second or third glass of vino, try taking a few moments of silence, perhaps take quiet walk and see if there is a thought or emotion present. Try listening and connecting with your breathing, and experience the moment with all of your senses. Just be. An experience of connecting with yourself in this way may well have an important and enlightening message for you that might just change your life and your business.

Have you tried connecting with yourself through silence?

If you'd like to explore the power of silence further, why not consider an online or offline retreat where you can take some time away to reconnect with your inner world?